Sorry I haven’t posted in a while!! Life has been incredibly busy, between new job and really getting into wedding planning and working on my fitness, I barely know my ass from my elbow these days.
Today I just wanted to share with you guys how I finally went all the way – and the foolishness that ensued as a result.
My goal for getting ready for my wedding (and losing my “lunchroom lady arms”) is a three-pronged attack: 1 – Working out with Ojeda once or twice a week; 2 – Sticking to my Weight Watchers plan; and 3 – some time of regular cardio). To get my cardio in I’ve been taking classes at a place called Dance Trance for the last month or so… and if you live anywhere there is a studio, check this out!! It’s a fun dance fitness class for those of us that like to shake our boo-tays. If you know me, then you know I’ve been waiting for a fitness class like this. Any class where you learn choreography to songs by Kylie Minogue, Nicki Minaj and T.I. is where I need to be – my favorite song from today’s class involve the lyrics “Call my man again and Ima f$@k you up”. LOL! Any class where the motto is “There are no mistakes, only solos” is my kinda place. 🙂
For the record, this isn’t a shameless plug for Dance Trance Orlando (although I think you should totally go!) but I’m just trying to explain how excited and semi-obsessed I’ve become with this place, and how it’s turning into one of the highlights of my week. But seriously, you should totally go.
I started my DT experience off slow, taking the Beginner’s Class once a week, and then last week I amped it up to the Intermediate Class on one day, and Beginner’s on the other. I enjoyed Intermediate so much that I let my ego get the best of me (FOOL!) and decided I’d check out Regular, Full-on, Make Yo Mama Weep, Bad Ass DT on my off day this morning, thinking the class would be smaller and I could sneak in.
FOOL!!!!!! I was SO not ready.
First of all, class was NOT small, it was packed with regulars that clearly come every Monday for this class, proving just how popular all of the classes are. Second of all, I started class off in the way I know best – I accidentally smacked the pregnant woman next to me in class. I smacked her during warm-ups and we accidentally bumped into each other for the next three songs, during which I alternated between groaning with exhaustion and yelping “sorry!” as I ran into Pregnant Lady. She was very good about it. Hopefully we can be friends. 🙂
Thirdly, I discovered that, when under duress, the backs of my knees, my chin, my calves and my eyeballs can all produce sweat. Rubbing the sweat out of my eyes not only burned but I also almost lost a contact lens. I literally could not tell if I was crying or just sweating from my eyelids/ eyeballs. On top of that, I got out-danced by a 26-week pregnant woman. There were times I was facing the exact wrong direction from the rest of the class, and at one point I took a seat to regain my composure and also asses the chin/calf-sweat problem. I was sweating from the roots of my hair to the space between my toes. When I stood up from my seat, I realized that I’d left a butt-sweat stamp on the chair. So not cute. When the instructor mentioned learning a new routine tomorrow night, I muttered “Oh God, no” out loud before my brain could stop itself. Pregnant Lady giggled.
By the end, although I really had fun, I was begging for release. I limped my soggy worn out butt back to my car – not in defeat, but relief that I’d made it through Regular Bad Ass DT and it was over. There was not one part of me that wasn’t sweaty. I’m hoping that at the very least I burned enough calories to cover that non-Weight Watchers-sanctioned philly cheesesteak from Friday’s Date Night.
Seriously, with every song I sweat my way through, I pray that I’m burning off stored fat from late nights of college drinking and those bad cases of the munchies. I’m sweating off years of bud lights, cheap vodka and french onion dip. And I can’t think of a more fun, although miserably sweaty, way to do it.
Getting home I could barely make it up the stairs of my condo without pausing for a breath. “Worn Out” doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel. I’m too gross to sit on the couch, so I’m Indian-style on the hardwood floor for easy clean up from my puddle of shame. I am so happy I took that class… Regular Slap-Yo-Mama Dance Trance is not easy, but it gives me something to work my way up to. Honestly, Intermediate will feel like a vacay after this, and the bonus is there aren’t any pregnant ladies to outdance me in that class. 🙂
Maybe the title of this blog should be ” Smacking Pregnant Ladies and Sweating with a Smile”.