Category Archives: Ten Days

10 Things!! Again!!

Standard

Yall remember this from last year??

WELL I was pinteresting as usual, searching for fun ideas when I came across this post from a cool blog called hopes & dreams: http://cherishinghopesanddreams.blogspot.com/2012/01/30-things.html

The blog post has 30 questions that you share and trade with your partner

THE LIST:

1. List 20 random facts about yourself.
2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.
3. Describe your relationship with your parents.
4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.
5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?
6. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?
7. What is your dream job, and why?
8. What are 5 passions you have?
9. List 10 people who have influenced you and describe how.
10. Describe your most embarrasing moment.
11. Describe 10 pet peeves you have.
12. Describe a typical day in your current life.
13. Describe 5 weaknesses you have.
14. Describe 5 strengths you have.
15. If you were an animal, what would you be and why?
16. What are your 5 greatest accomplishments?
17. What is the thing you most wish you were great at?
18. What has been the most difficult thing you have had to forgive?
19. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?
20. Describe 3 significant memories from your childhood.
21. If you could have one superpower, what would it be and what would you do with it first?
22. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years?
23. List your top 5 hobbies and why you love them.
24. Describe your family dynamic of your childhood vs. your family dynamic now.
25. If you could have dinner with anyone in history, who would it be and what would you eat?
26. What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?
27. What is your favorite part of your body and why?
28. What is your love language?
29. What do you think people misundertand most about you?
30. List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.

 

 

Anyway, I sent my first 10 to the BFE. Check out my responses, and I’ll post the others as we go along. I encourage everyone to swap answers with the close people in their lives. It’s interesting to see how much stuff you already knew, and how much you didn’t!

 

From: Peach
Sent: Friday, September 14, 2012 5:32 PM
To: BFE
Subject: 30 Things
 
Here are the first 10. See my answers and send yours back!

THE LIST:

1. List 20 random facts about yourself.

  1. I’m left-handed
  2. My favorite color is pink
  3. I used to be a spelling bee champ in elementary school
  4. I’m addicted to social media
  5. I’m obsessed with being a good friend
  6. I think brussel sprouts are disgusting
  7. Really disgusting
  8. I love reading
  9. I probably apologize too much
  10. I hate people making me feel stupid
  11. I am a hopeless romantic, but I hate for people to see that
  12. I believe in reincarnation. I don’t think that makes me less of a Christian.
  13. I love dogs but I lurrrrrv cats!
  14. My goal in life is to be happy. Not to be a firefighter, not to be good at this or that, but ultimately – just be happy.
  15. I want to have kids one day.
  16. If I’m mean to you it’s because I like you and think you’re cool.
  17. I (not so) secretly adore crafting.
  18. Shows I watched between 2008 – 2012: The Tudors, Gossip Girl, Game of Thrones, The Borgias, Phineas & Ferb, The Closer, Rome.
  19. I am still hopeful that the show Firefly will make a comeback. Come back!!!!
  20. I have never truly and unequivocally been in love until the summer of 2011.


2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.

  1.  I am afraid of car accidents – my family and I have been in quite a few and the worst one for me was hitting a dividing wall in a crash that could have sent me off of a bridge. They scare me so much.
  2. I am afraid that we won’t be able to have kids. I am also afraid that we will have kids that have disabilities and I won’t know how to handle that.
  3. I’m afraid my natural meanness will drive away the ones that I love.


3. Describe your relationship with your parents.

Shaky at times, and great at other times. I am afraid of failing them. My dad is a great listener, and my mother has high expectations, which I am fearful that I’ll never meet, because I’m not the person that she wants me to be.

4. List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could.

  1.    Wait!! Wait until you’re doing it for the right reasons.
  2. Don’t be such a wallflower. Be more assertive.
  3. Don’t be afraid to get in trouble at school, if that means you will lean over and tell that a-hole in your science class and on your bus to shut the f$%# up and leave you the hell alone.
  4. When that bully tries to push you around, but hide. Fight back. It’ll help you gain confidence in the future.
  5. Finish your homework! Dammit.
  6. DO NOT. PUT THAT NOTE. IN THAT BOY’S LOCKER. Please. I’m begging you.
  7. Don’t go to the interview at Pretzel Time. You’re allergic to yeast.
  8. When boys talk to you and your friends like that set a higher standard and move on, Martha, move on!
  9. When taking the PSAT, consider all of the school options and go for what you want. Stand up for what you want – fight for it. It’s your future!
  10. Remember how awesome you are! You do NOT have thunder thighs, you’re a size 8. Shut up.

5. What are the 5 things that make you most happy right now?

  1. “Nesting” with the man of my dreams
  2. Planning a wedding with the man of my dreams
  3. Realizing that I have os much love and support in my life, thanks to the people in it.
  4. I am heading to “date night” with my fiance
  5. I won 500 tickets at Dave & Buster’s this afternoon at the Staff Appreciation Lunch!

6. What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced?
Arguing with my mother back in July, and what she said to me during that argument. I don’t think I will ever forget that. No one tells you how hard it is to forgive and forget. Especially the forget part.

7. What is your dream job, and why?
Samantha Brown’s job!! Hands down.

8. What are 5 passions you have?

  1. love & romance
  2. friendships
  3. travel
  4. making a difference in the world – leaving my mark
  5. I have to think on this one!


9. List 10 people who have influenced you and describe how.

  1. My Concierge Manager when I was at Gaylord Palms
  2. My American Lit teach in the 11th grade. Not for good reasons, though. She hated me.
  3. Samantha Brown – I realized you can make a living from travel!
  4. My fiance – he wears his heart on his sleeve and his sincerity makes me want to be less of an a-hole
  5. My mom – I spent most of my formative years trying to be the person she wanted me to be, and I think it set my own character development back because of it.
  6. Bill Clinton – because he’s Bill. Effing. Clinton.
  7. hmm… I owe you three more!

10. Describe your most embarrassing moment.
When I had an accident in the 7th grade when “my grandma” came ot town early. My acclerated program teach told me to tie my sweater around my waist – I didn’t know what happened, but my classmates did. It was only a few years ago that I could think of that situation without getting horribly embarrassed.

 
 
His response:
 
On Fri, Sep 14, 2012 at 5:33 PM, The BFE the.bfe@bfe.com wrote:

What is this? Homework? That’s a LOT OF STUFF!!!!

Uhm…ok. I”ll get cracking.

 

10 Days – 1 Photo

Standard

This is me.

Taken back in December 2008 – I was turning 30! We were in Vegas for my birthday, staying at this great spa resort called Loews Lake Vegas. It was so beautiful. I had just checked in with my sisters, and was exploring the property. We found this super cool patio area that pretty much turns into a fricking nightclub after dark, and started snapping pics.

Some people might see a cute, perky, somewhat chubby girl. For a while all I could see was a fat, aging, back-fat roll-having spinster who’s just happy to get out of the house. I stopped just enjoying the memories this picture brought back – the memories of hitting a milestone in my life and sharing it with those that mattered.

A pic when I was excited, lively and just happy to be me.

A pic that shows an expression that I want to see on my face every day, for the rest of my life. I know that’s not entirely possible or realistic, but I think striving to be happy is a pretty admirable goal.

 You’ve gotten 10 people, 9 secrets, 8 fears, 7 wants, 6 places, 5 books, 4 foods, 3 films 2 songs (and a partridge in a pear tree!! c’mon, you were thinking it.) So that wraps up my ten days! Ok, it might have taken me close to 30 to get it done but you people made me bare my soul.

Stripping takes time.

Peace out,

 The Sunburnt Peach

10 Days – 2 Songs

Standard

 

2 Songs

 

Craaaa-aaap. This one’s gonna be hard.

 

2. “Smile” by Uncle Kracker

For some reason this one makes me… wait for it… smile. ROTFL

It’s a sweet song, and to me sings like a lullaby to the one you love. I can’t help but enjoy it.

 

 

1. Trip Around the Sun by Martina McBride & Jimmy Buffett

I listen to this one every year on my birthday… it reminds me that life is short, and we should spend more time enjoying instead of wallowing in our mistakes. Check it out – have you ever listened to the lyrics?

“Hear ’em singing Happy Birthday
Better think about the wish I made
This year gone by ain’t been a piece of cake
Every day’s a revolution
Pull it together and it comes undone
Just one more candle and a trip around the sun

Chorus:
I’m just hanging on while this old world keeps spinning
And it’s good to know it’s out of my control
If there’s one thing that I’ve learned from all this living
Is that it wouldn’t change a thing if I let go

No, you never see it coming
Always wind up wondering where it went
Only time will tell if it was time well spent
It’s another revelation
Celebrating what I should have done
With these souvenirs of my trip around the sun

(Chorus)

Yes, I’ll make a resolution
That I’ll never make another one
Just enjoy this ride on my trip around the sun
Just enjoy this ride …
Until it’s done

 

 

Okay, and I have to add this very last one in… I know it’s more than 2, but so what? It’s my blog, so I can cheat whenever I’d like.

 

I want to add: “You’re Still Innocent” by Taylor Swift.

I don’t care what yall say. I LURV Taylor Swift. You might not admire her singing, but anyone has to admit the girl can write an amazing song.

I guess you really did it this time
Left yourself in your warpath
Lost your balance on a tightrope
Lost your mind tryin’ to get it back

Wasn’t it easier in your lunchbox days?
Always a bigger bed to crawl into
Wasn’t it beautiful when you believed in everything?
And everybody believed in you?

It’s all right, just wait and see
Your string of lights are still bright to me
Oh, who you are is not what you’ve been
You’re still an innocent
You’re still an innocent

Did some things you can’t speak of
But at night you’ll live it all again
You wouldn’t be shattered on the floor now
If only you woulda seen what you know now, then

Wasn’t it easier in your firefly-catchin’ days?
When everything out of reach, someone bigger brought down to you
Wasn’t it beautiful runnin’ wild ’til you fell asleep?
Before the monsters caught up to you?

It’s all right, just wait and see
Your string of lights are still bright to me
Oh, who you are is not what you’ve been
You’re still an innocent
It’s okay, life is a tough crowd
32, and still growin’ up now
Who you are is not what you did
You’re still an innocent

Time turns flames to embers
You’ll have new Septembers
Everyone of us has messed up too
Lives change like the weather
I hope you remember
Today is never to late to
Be brand new

It’s all right, just wait and see
Your string of lights are still bright to me
Oh, who you are is not what you’ve been
You’re still an innocent
It’s okay, life is a tough crowd
32, and still growin’ up now
Who you are is not what you did
You’re still an innocent
You’re still an innocent

Lost your balance on a tightrope
It’s never too late to get it back

 

I think this whole process, this exercise of sharing things and putting numbers to them is influence by the moment… would I name completely different songs in six months? Perhaps.

 

10 Days – 3 Films

Standard

3 Films

3. My Fair Lady

“I could have danced all night, I could have danced all night… and still have begged for more…”

My ALL TIME TOP FAVORITE MUSICAL! This is the one that launched me into my musical obsession when I was a kid. Although I HATED the ending… the last scene he asks her to go get his slippers. Yuck.

Despite that uber-ridiculous final scene, this was my first Audrey Hepburn film, and since this movie I’ve become a huge fan of hers. “The rain in Spain stays mainly in the plain!” LOL

2. Love Actually

I LOVE this movie, little vignettes about Londoners getting through the Christmas Holidays. It’s part hilarious, frustrating, sad, and fulfilling – really all the elements the make up a family Christmas, right?

“I feel it in my fingers, feel it in my too-oes… Christ-mas is all around us, it’s every-where that you go-ooo”…. ROTFL… You’d really have to see it to get it. Otherwise I just sound like a random song-singing freak.

1. Star Wars, Episode 4… or 5? Can’t decide which one I like the most…

While I was writing this post, I was watching “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull”. I almost made that number one… not because I like it, but because I liked all the other Indiana Jones movies, and Crystal Skull ( in my humble opinion) was like they took a giant juicy dump all over the Indiana Jones franchise. I’ve never been so disappointed in my life to watch the sequal to a movie that I love.

Except maybe Star Wars.

I even went to the Star Wars Convention last summer –  CELEBRATION V! Some things once seen, cannot be unseen.

 

I’ve enjoyed watching Star Wars since I was a kid, and REALLY have only gotten into it during the last few years. So you can imagine my disappointment with Episodes 1, 2 and 3. ESPECIALLY 2 and 3. So much stupid packed into just a few films. What was George Lucas thinking? Did he have a bad acid trip and then write this crap? Did he just want to get it all over with? Either way, it’s just awful. Ask the folks that gave their commentary in The People Vs. George Lucas.

Either way, it’s hard to really narrow this blog down to just 3 films… hope what I wrote made sense. 🙂

10 Days – 5 Books & Why I Don’t Loan People Sh!t Anymore

Standard

5 Books

5. White Teeth by Zadie Smith

I first read this book back in college when I was taking a modern Brit Lit class to complete my requirements for my English degree. You can literally feel the heart and soul Smith put into this book. I can’t even begin to summarize the story and do it justice. It goes into the lives of two different families – one English & Jamaican, one Bengali (Indian) – and the struggles they face assimilating into contemporary British life.

I love the way Smith describes scenes:

“…despite all this, it is still hard to admit that there is no one more English than the Indian, no one more Indian than the English. There are still young white men who are angry about that; who will roll out at closing time into the poorly lit streets with a kitchen knife wrapped in a tight fist. But it makes an immigrant laugh to hear the fears of the nationalist, scared of infection, penetration, miscegenation, when this is small fry, peanuts, compared to what the immigrant fears – dissolution, disappearance.”
Zadie Smith, White Teeth
 
“It seems to me,’ said Magid finally, as the moon became clearer than the sun, ‘that you have tried to love a man as if he were an island and you were shipwrecked and you could mark the land with an X. It seems to me it is too late in the day for all that.’
Then he gave her a kiss on the forehead that felt like a baptism and she wept like a baby.”
Zadie Smith, White Teeth

 

 

4. Mansfield Park by Jane Austen

 

Such a great novel. I do think the fact that the protagonist ends up marrying her cousin is a little weird, but the book itself an interesting conversation on the subjects of poverty vs. wealth, slavery (in many forms) vs. freedom, love vs. lust. I actually used this book in my final thesis to discuss the poor parent figures that dominate virtually all of Austen’s work.

3. Interview with the Vampire by Anne Rice

My mom bought my first Anne Rice book for me, although I don’t think she would have had she really understood

 some of the subject matter! Then again, my mom also regularly gave me the Creative Loafing Magazines when I was in my pre-teens (Atlanta’s leading alternative newspaper) so who knows?? Either way, I’m grateful to her for introducing me to the perfect reading material for a semi-social awkward young girl. It was cool reading stealing out of reality for a little while.

 I read through this series like a madperson, then devoured her Witching Hour/ Mayfair Family series, and moved on to her other books. Sometimes her writing gets a bit wordy, but I liked the dark, deviant, bloody and disturbing world she sucks you into. This is also the first book I ever loaned to someone and DIDN’T GET BACK.

THIS BOOK IS WHY I DON’T LOAN PEOPLE SH!T ANYMORE!

(There are a few people who I consider as exceptions to this rule, but for the most part if you ask to borrow my books I’ll say hell-to-the-naw.)

2. The Babysitter’s Club #1: Kristy’s Great Idea by Ann M. Martin

I remember when I’d have to save my allowance to buy these books, and how they were the only things I’d ask for at Christmas and on my birthday… besides gift cards to Waldenbooks or cash for book fairs to go buy more of them! As soon as a new book in the series arrived at the store, I’d tear right through it, then have to sit, pissed off and frustrated that I didn’t have any more to read until the new one came out MONTHS later.

I must have read at least 90 of them, plus 3 Super Specials before I eventually moved on to Sweet Valley High. 

1. Stardust by Neil Gaiman

 One of my top ten ALL TIME favorite books. What’s funny is it’s one of the few books I’ve ever read after seeing the movie first! Movie wasn’t great, but the storyline still seemed pretty interesting.

 It’s a fairy tale, and I have read it cover to cover so many times I cannot count. Each time it touches my heart all over again. Since reading this book, I’ve become a huge fan of Gaiman.

“I mean, maybe I am crazy. I mean, maybe. But is this is all there is, then I don’t want to be sane. ” 
Neil Gaiman, Stardust
 
“Every lover is, in his heart, a madman, and, in his head, a minstrel.”
Neil Gaiman, Stardust
 
“…So what I want to know is why it is that I can no longer find you, in my mind. You are still there, just, but you are there like a ghost, a will o’ the wisp. Not long ago you burned–your heart burned–in my mind like silver fire. But after that night in the inn it became patchy and dim, and now it is not there at all.””Could it be that the heart that you seek is no longer my own? …I have given my heart to another.””The boy? The one in the inn? With the unicorn?””Yes.”

“You should have let me take it back then, for my sisters and me. We could have been young again, well into the next age of the world. Your boy will break it, or waste it, or lose it. They all do.”

“Nonetheless, he has my heart. I hope your sisters will not be too hard on you, when you return to them without it.”
Neil Gaiman, Stardust

 
 
 
I always find it odd when people say they don’t read books. How can you not love to read? Is it narcissistic that I consider people who don’t read as odd? It’s usually a good indicator that we probably won’t have a whole lot in common. I also have a bad habit of mentally adjusting their possible IQ by a few points. Let’s be honest. Stupid people don’t read a lot. I know, it’s mean of me, but I can’t help it. I think I’m like, a book snob.
 
Since I was a kid I’ve loved books – fiction, history, poetry, funny, sad, long, short, pictures, no pictures. I read them at the dinner table, in the car, in the bathtub, on the toilet. 🙂 I remember getting in trouble with a teach in the 3rd grade because I was secretly reading a book in class. I’d already finished my work and had nothing to do, so I whipped out my newest book and started to read. She took it away from me. A few days after, she called me mom in to tell her that I was Antisocial and suggested that I spend more time at “slumber parties” with my classmates. The truth is, I didn’t like more of my classmates. A lot of them were ignorant asshats that teased me for reading.  And for having glasses. And for having a big nose. So why the eff would I want to spend more time with them than necessary?
 
Here’s the definition of antisocial:
1. Shunning the society of others; not sociable.
2. Hostile to or disruptive of the established social order; marked by or engaging in behavior that violates accepted mores: gangs engaging in vandalism and other antisocial behavior.
3. Antagonistic toward or disrespectful of others; rude.
 
Let’s be clear: Charles Manson is Antisocial. He was also a psychopath. Unless a small child is mutilating animals in the basement of her neighbor’s house, calling her antisocial is a bit harsh! My mom basically told her where to go regarding my “antisocial behavior” and advised her not to call a parent-teacher conference again unless it was for a real issue.
 
Either way, it didn’t deter me from reading, and it’s still something I enjoy today. I’m happy to share my love for books with you all 🙂

10 Days – 6 Places

Standard

 

 

 

I am like, so behind! I should have posted this Saturday! Sorry folks… I’ll try and play catch up.

 

6 Places

 

 

6. A Bench in Edinburgh Scotland

My Edinburgh bench pic - taken before I got smashed at a Mexican restaurant at the top of the Royal Mile

In 2004 I went to the UK to visit Shann the Man, a friend of mine from Georgia who was studying abroad for a year, going to school at Northumbria University in Newcastle. Apart from being my first trip overseas, it was my first trip alone AND overseas. I had the best time, and still have lots of memories of going there. One I remember the most is a day trip we took to Edinburgh.

Edinburgh seemed like this green/gray new/old place, where people live within walking distance of so much history, where the grass is greener than I’ve ever seen but the skies are always gray. I loved the place the moment we stepped off the train. While wandering through this city that had completely captivated my heart, we took a walk in the park and came across a series of benches with plaques on them, dedicating those places to special people. One that caught my eye read “In Memory of Katherine L.W. Read, M.A., who loved this city”. That inscription just about broke my heart. I thought about the person that must have left such a deep mark that someone wrote out that dedication. So that I wouldn’t ever forget it, I took a picture which I occasionally pull out and marvel at.

 

 

5. In my car, riding down a tree-lined road, singing at the top of my lungs

Banyan tree-lined road on Little Gasparilla Island, FL

One of my favorite things to do is drive down a beautiful winding road, watching the scenery a bit and singing at the top of my lungs. It’s one of my favorite places to be is in my car. Susie Miranda.

That’s right: I named my car. I love my car. She’s been good to me, and she’s the first car I’ve purchased, on my own, without help from my parents. The best part is the cd player! I put in mixed CDs I make and toodle around town, singing my favorite songs at the top of my lungs. I have my own little karaoke session every day – in my car.

 

 

4. Cafe Intermezzo, Atlanta

This European-style cafe holds so many memories – many evenings spent with happy friends, dawdling over hot chocolate, coffee and amazing desserts (which I of course had no business eating, but how do you say no to homemade oreo cheesecake?!). They’re open until 4am every night and don’t ever rush you. We’d sit there for hours just talking about those “life or death” situations that were so important to college student… which in the end was super silly but those nights are part of the glue that held my friends together.  Every time I go home to visit I try to stop by.

 

 

3. The arms of the one I love

When I think of this place, words like “safe”, “comfort”, “happiness” come to mind. I’ve never been very demonstrative when it comes to relationships, but seeking comfort in his arms just comes naturally. It’s a place I look forward to being at the end of the day, and a wonderful place to wake up in too.

Nothing says lovin' like carving your girlfriend's pumpkin.

Feet in the sand, utterly content.

sheepish happiness... baaaaaah 🙂

 

 

2. Anywhere my friends are.

Some friends are fun people to hang around. Some friends are great lunch buddies. Other friends become a part of your family with shared memories and laughter that help form who you are.

I am lucky to have friends that are family. Wherever they are is a place I want to be. 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

1. Christmas with the folks

A place I look forward to every year, with all of our weird traditions, and booze, and laughter and arguments and silent treatments and hilarious surprises (my mom once stuck LUBE in my Christmas stocking) it’s one of the very best parts of being in my family.

I remember one year almost choking on a sip from my littlest sis’s hot apple cider because I hadn’t realized that she’d spiked it with Crown Royal… both of my sisters insist on the three of us sleeping in the same bed on Christmas Eve, and we drive each other mad by pinching each other WITH OUR TOES. Once my dad gave me a dish rack for a Christmas gift. Who wouldn’t want to go home to that?!?

 

 

As I was working on this list I thought at first I’d think about places I want to go, trips I want to take. Instead, I ended up focusing on places I’ve been and the people that make them special. What’s more important, thinking about the want-tos or the already-haves 🙂

10 Days – 7 Wants

Standard

 

7 Wants

 

 

7. The American Dream & The whole shebang: an awesome engagement, a beautiful wedding and an amazing lifelong marriage and partnership. Add to that kids, 2 cars, big fluffy dog, a house… both of us employed and excelling in our fields. Totally stereotypical girly stuff 🙂

 

 

6. To live in another country, even just for a year or two. What a life-changing experience that would be! The BBE and I joke around that if Michelle Bachmann gets elected to the presidency that we are moving to Scotland. I suggested Canada, but he didn’t want to live in the country that he refers to as “America Lite” because “no one really like diet stuff anyway” ROTFL… ?!?! Poor Canada. Scotland it is. Are there any black people in Scotland? When I visited, I didn’t see nary a one.

 

 

5. To lose fantastic amounts of weight. It’s sad that my current goal is to lose another 75 pounds… and that still puts me in the Slightly Overweight category. Sometimes it seems like a faraway dream, located right past the cherry cheesecake and McDonald’s fries. Arg. Surprisingly, I think living in Scotland might help with this. People walk more than the drive, and the food’s not nearly as tasty. I’ll be rail -thin in no time!

 

 

4. A happy medium, where all of the people I love and need in my life are reasonably short driving distances away. Sometimes I wish I could roll a bunch of cities into one to create my own personalized “Super City” that’s close to the beach, the mountains, not too hot or cold but still has seasons. My parents and sisters and friends from all other the map would live there, and we’d all hang out all the time and have picnics and fireworks and beach parties…

 

 

3. Balls. I wish I had balls. Not literally, just wishing I had the nerve to stand up for what I believe in always. I find it amazing that I’m perceived as being tough and confident. We all have those moments when we don’t agree with what’s going on or being said, and yet we still sit back and do nothing. One of my wants is to have balls: balls to ask for that raise, balls to tell my roommate he’s an effing slob and the laundry room isn’t his personal closet, balls to stand up and say that I’m not ashamed of what I believe… I believe in the Father, the Son and the Heavenly Ghost… and not stress so much about offending people that I cringe from standing my ground. Instead, I tend to vent my feelings via blog post 🙂

 

 

2. Kids… maybe just one or two? With the guy I love. Kids that are cute, smart and adorable. HOWEVER, I really need to lose weight to accomplish this. Also, I don’t want to end up on a TLC or Discovery Fit & Health TV special called “Obese and Pregnant! There. I said it out loud.

 

1. The publish my work, whether that’s a book, or become a really famous blogger, or write articles for a magazine… I get a thrill when people stop by my dorky little site and read what I’ve deemed meaningful enough to share. It would make me feel like I’ve really done something wonderful and that I just might have a talent for writing.

 

 

What else is left? A fulfilling life?  Maybe to be better at golf? Be less of a sore loser at boardgames? Shoot, I’ve got so many petty wants trying to cloud my path and stop me from focusing on the big ones and figuring out how to make them happen.

 

This Ten Day thing is killing me, sucking all those bits I leave in my secretest places right out of me and forcing them into black and white… and pink :). I’m only on number 7, and I already feel stripped bare. Good grief, what’s left???

10 Days – 8 Fears

Standard

8 Fears

8. Fear of dying old and alone

This mostly stems from my fear of being unlovable, losing all my friends, and alienating everyone around me. (should I post this as #1?)

7. Fear of heights

What sucks the most about this is that I spent quite a few years as a followspot operator in various theaters and venues… which requires working pretty high up from the ground. Heights still freak me out and probably always will. I get stressed just being on airplanes and usually self-medicate with Benadryl or alcohol.

I always imagine the same scenario: During takeoff for a long flight, I have flashbacks from the first scene of Final Destination where the plane blows up, resulting in me becoming a raving lunatic that turns utterly batshit crazy and getting sucker punched by an overzealous air marshal.

6. Fear of the dark (especially after watching an American Horror Story marathon)

When I was about 8 or 9 years old, I had a babysitter that rather cruelly allowed me to watch Nightmare on Elm Street. I was completely scarred by the image of Johnny Depp getting sucked into the bed, and then spewed out across the ceiling. For years I had the same night ritual: if I needed a drink of water or had to pee in the middle of the night, I’d stand on the edge of my bed and jump to the door, because I was afraid that Freddy Kruger would grab me by the ankles and drag me away. I didn’t sleep in the middle of my bed so it would make it harder for Freddy to suck me in the bed and spew out my guts across the ceiling.

The BBE and I recently started watching American Horror Story, and I have to say, that is one of the scariest shows I’ve seen as an adult (apart from The Human Centipede). It’s brought back that old fear of the dark, that fear that someone is standing behind me, waiting to get me! Last night I went to the bathroom in the dark and scuttled back to my bed, convinced that one of the creepy characters from American Horror Story was lurking in my closet.

5. Fear of being fat forever

For a long time, this was huge secret that I didn’t want to share with anyone. The worst was that, by not speaking it into existence and acknowledging that I had a challenge in front of me, I didn’t do anything about it.

The Get Fit With Nick program has done a LOT to put me in control of my own body. I still feel like I have a long road ahead of me that involves a lot of squats, spinning classes and watching what I eat, but at least I’m doing something about it.  I’m still scared though… at any moment I could just quit trying and slide back into my old habits of doing nothing but being afraid of everything.

4. Fear of death

People say it’s the “next big adventure”… I think it’s the lack of knowing that scares me, fear of existing, fear that maybe I haven’t been good enough in this life to warrant forgiveness and acceptance in the next one… in heaven.

3. Fear of having kids

I want to! But I’m also scared. After listening to stories from all my friends that have had kids, it’s pretty scary/ gross/ painful/ stressful/ difficult. I think, especially in this day and age where old grown men in places of power are dictating what I as a woman should do and should not do with my body (what gives you the RIGHT to tell me what I should do?!?) dealing with healthcare during one of the scariest and most amazing moments in your life really stresses me out. ‘Nuff said 🙂

2. Fear of having kids and then being a bad parent

What if, once I have kids I can’t afford to give them all the things they need or things I want to give them? What if I push them too much or not enough? What if I have rambunctious horrible children that are worthy of their own Supernanny episode? How will I potty train them? Teach them their letters and to not talk to strangers? What if, when they become teenagers I want to choke the life out of them? Being a parent is an awesome responsibility that I’m completely afraid of. Yet I also want to do it. Which possibly makes me crazy?

1. Fear of never accomplishing anything amazing in my lifetime (and/or before the zombie apocalypse/ Rapture)

I want to make my mark on the world. I just have no idea how to do it.

Wow, I don’t think I’ve ever articulated all of these fears to any one person. And now I’m posted them all on the internet.

10 Days – 9 Secrets

Standard

Annnnd we’re back! Time for 9 Secrets. This is gonna get juicy. 🙂

9. Every few months or so, I think of names I’d like to name my kid(s)… you know, the ONES I DON’T HAVE YET.

Who does that? Is that a girl thing? Is that weird? I’m a little embarrassed to admit this.

2 names that that have been on my mind lately: Everette and Brannon. Weird names, right? But just a titch better than LaTiffany and TaMichael (yes, I know people that have those names – TRUTH).

8. Sometimes when I hear songs that I love, I imagine what the video should be like… then I’m disappointed when they’re finally made and they’re not at all what I thought they’d be like.

I also feel the same way about books I enjoy, too.

7.  I still sleep with my stuffed Winnie the Pooh.

He’s my boyfriend! Apart from the BBE, of course. And he doesn’t judge me for drooling or snoring. He doesn’t get mad when I push him out of the bed and hog his covers. You gotta appreciate that.

6.  When I’m on my own, I enjoy watching Britcoms, especially “The Vicar Of Dibley”.

PBS used to show old Britcoms on Saturday nights. I have never minded not having something to do on a Saturday night: snuggling up in my PJs in the bed with Winnie the Pooh and the most awesome comedies to come out of the UK in the 80’s is TOTALLY fun to me.

5. I can pinch things with my toes. I don’t know how I learned to do it, I just always have. I use my toes to pick up things when I’m lazy, and also to terrorize people. Toe pinching hurts!

4. When no one’s home, I put Rockband or Band Hero into the wii, turn it up loud and sing to my heart’s content. The whole time I’m doing it I’m paranoid that someone’s going to come in and catch me.

3. I’m more of a hopeless romantic than I let on. I love grand gestures, flowers, love notes, surprises. Perhaps a side effect of reading too much Jane Austen? What’s weird is that I’m NOT comfortable with excessive amounts of PDA. Hand holding is pretty much as far as it will go.

2. I’m obsessed with body functions. I’m also particularly obsessed with cleaning my ears. I also have a tendency to stick my finger in my belly button and sniff it.

1. I still watch Degrassi on Teen Nick sometimes (I have nothing further to say on the subject).

10 Days – 10 people

Standard

My 10-Day Challenge (to Myself)

So I was reading girlseekskiss‘s blog the other day, and came across what I thought was a super cool idea…

Over the next few weeks, I want to highlight 10 people, 9 secrets (yikes), 8 fears (double yikes!), 7 wants, 6 places, 5 books, 4 foods, 3 films, 2 songs and 1 picture of myself.

I thought this would be an interesting blogging exercise, a good writer’s exercise, to see what comes from this. It’ll be so organic, and I have NO idea what’s going to come out! So bear with me folks… here I go!  🙂

10 People

Wow, this is going to be hard.

10. The boy that affected my college decision.

When I was in high school, I got accepted to every college I applied to, including UGA and Georgia Southern. I’d originally only applied to GA Southern because one of my closest friends (and dude I had a ridiculous crush on) was applying there. He also applied to UGA.

When the acceptance letters came in, he got accepted to Georgia Southern and waitlisted for UGA. So I decided NOT to go to my #1 choice but follow him to GA Southern. WHO DOES THAT?!? Oh wait – ME.

Long story short, I hated GA Southern, we drifted apart as friends, and I transferred to Georgia State University to finish my degree. I never regretted that decision: I honestly think almost everything that has happened to me since (good & bad) has all stemmed from my move back to Atlanta. I can’t imagine what my life would have been like had I not followed that silly boy down to Statesboro, GA.

9. Samantha Brown

Alright, this sounds nuts but she has really helped me to develop my outlook on traveling to new places! She really dives into travel and immerses herself in the people, food and culture of a place. She’s honest and witty and doesn’t take it all too seriously. I totally wanna be her when I grow up!

8. The person that selected me to be laid off from my former job.

As stranger as it sounds, I’d like to say THANK YOU!! to whomever it was in HR or my department or whatever that, when my former company was having financial trouble and having to let people go, decided I was one of the ones that should be laid off.

I spent a long time feeling resentful of that situation, and wondering what I’d done wrong that resulted in me being picked. I cried. A lot. I hadn’t been without a job since I was 15. I felt like a failure.

Honestly? Working at that hotel really put the “cult” in “workplace culture”: We were a tight-knit family working for a common goal, and really felt that management cared about us. Maybe they really did – I’m not sure. What I do know is that I felt like I was leaving family behind, and being sent away. I was having withdrawal pains from this place that had been the center of my life since I moved to Florida. It was hard. What I had to face up to is that WORK is about BUSINESS. It’s not personal, it’s not how much they like you, or who is friends with who. The people that you care about, and who care abotu you, will still keep in touch no matter what. I learned to do a better job of “leaving work at work”. In the real world, as much as a company can create a culture that sucks you in, at the end of the day, when they let you go, it’s just business.

Two years later, I’m working for a company where I could not possibly be happier. I love the people I work with, but I also temper that with accepting that it’s still business at the end of the day.

7. Jessica the BFF

This chick is hilarious. Like, really, really hilarious. I oculd gush about how lucky I am to have a BFF that listens and cares, and laughs because we have the same sense of humor, but that’s not why she’s on the list.

Apart from being one of the most cracked-out crazy pants awesome people I know, Messy Jessy is also the smartest. I mean that. LITERALLY one of the smartest most driven people I’ve ever met in my life. Which in turns challenges me to bust my ass for the things I want. Can you ask for a better friend than that?

Ok, how about one that will move into your 2-bedroom apartment with you because the thrill of living alone wore off and now you’re too scared to go to sleep alone in the apartment at night? One that will keep you company so you can stop imagining escape routes out of your bedroom in the event intruders come in through the patio? ‘Cause that’s what she did. She sort of saved my sanity. 🙂

6. Delton the other BFF

Taught me a lot of about seeing your way through to the other side after it feels like your whole house has fallen down around you.

We went through some pretty shitty events together (including a roommate from hell that stole our identities and turned out to be a sociopath). We yelled and screamed at each other, and tried to break each other down but in the end propped each other up. I learned that no matter how much it sucks, things are always much better with a partner by your side.

I also learned never to fight with your significant other in front of other people – no one wants to see that! So Delton, I’m sure the BBE thanks you for that too 🙂

Delton also had the cojones to tell his parents that he liked boys… in the meantime, I live in another state and stil haven’t manned up and told me parents that the BBE is probably moving in starting January. I totally admire him for that kind of courage.

5. Winnie the Pooh

He’s a ditsy fat yellow bear… we’re not that much different… he also addicted to honey (sugar)… yet another similarity…

He’s also NOT a fan of wearing pants, a personal preference of mine which I believe we’ve previously covered in other blogs.

One thing Pooh has down pat though, is figuring out who is friends are, and appreciating them. Especially if they have honey in the house 🙂

Pooh keeps it real, yo.

4. Snitch and Flip

My sisters. When I meet other people that don’t get along with their family/ siblings, I am grateful for the relationship I have with Lil Middle Sis (Flip) and Littlest Sis (Snitch). We always have a good time together, ever though we will occasionally get on one another’s nerves. What family gathering would be complete without someone bossing the others around, someone geting pissed off, someone drinking wine like it’s water, and another one spiking the holiday apple cider with crown royal??

3. Sunshine

My stepdad IS my dad, and my dad rocks. Plain and simple. I started calling him Sunshine a few years back, it caught on and that’s that.

I’m probably not always the best kid to my dad. And he might not always agree with my decisions, but he’s dependable, and patient and listens and gives me honest feedback. He’s also possibly the 2nd most hilarious person I know.

2. Maaaaaaaaa

Come on, y’all knew number one would be my mom, right?

My mom and I bump heads. A lot.

Remember when you were a kid? And you were like “I will NEVER be like my parents! I will be my kid’s friend and let them eat cake for dinner and take them to DisneyWorld every weekend if they want and NEVER make them do homework! And if they don’t want to go to school or college or do homework, then they don’t have to.”

When I was in high school, I soooooooooooo wanted to be like my mom… I would steal dresses out of her closet when she wasn’t looking so I could wear them at school. I observed how she walked so I could have the same walk, and subconsciously, I still have a lot of the same mannerisms she does.

We didn’t have a super-close relationship, though. I used to wish we were like my friends and their moms. I often think that’s because, as my personality formed, it was so different from how she wanted me to be. When I was younger, it hurt to think that I wasn’t measuring up to her image and expectation. And her expectation was HIGH. She put her boot up my ass and made me work hard: bringing home Cs wasn’t an option. Being lazy or rude wasn’t an option either.

When I hit college I decided to do my best to NOT be like her, and spent a lot of effort into being who I wanted to be and went a bit overboard. I’m grateful to those years because I learned to just be me, and like myself. Eventually, when you really like who you are, like really really like who you are, other people will like you, too. And that’s what happened.

I am grateful for those “boot up the ass” years, too. I am lucky that I had parents that believed in me. I didn’t appreciate it at the time. Who ever really does?

I live in another state now, away from my parents. I miss my mom sometimes, and we’ve gotten closer through our phone conversations, and enjoy the time we do have together because we don’t take it for granted. One interesting thing: more and more lately, I’m noticing that we share a LOT of personality traits. Which I actually kinda like 🙂

1. The Atlanta Crew: Castey Wayne, Kev, and LauraEllen

Real friends that will pick you up at the airport (and drop you off later too). Real friends that you have seen the good, the best, the bad and the ugly… and they know all that about you too.

Real friends tell you the truth, and keep your head screwed on straight even when you don’t want to hear it.

Real friends don’t bat an eyelash when you have crazy batshit plans – they simple burst out laughing, try to discourage you, then eventually tag along because they’re your friend. Quite often, they also supply the booze.

Real friends that you can look in the eye across a room, and immediately start laughing because you both know you’re thinking the SAME THING… “why is that b!tch wearing spandex?!?”

So… those are my ten!