Tag Archives: toes

10 Days – 9 Secrets

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Annnnd we’re back! Time for 9 Secrets. This is gonna get juicy. 🙂

9. Every few months or so, I think of names I’d like to name my kid(s)… you know, the ONES I DON’T HAVE YET.

Who does that? Is that a girl thing? Is that weird? I’m a little embarrassed to admit this.

2 names that that have been on my mind lately: Everette and Brannon. Weird names, right? But just a titch better than LaTiffany and TaMichael (yes, I know people that have those names – TRUTH).

8. Sometimes when I hear songs that I love, I imagine what the video should be like… then I’m disappointed when they’re finally made and they’re not at all what I thought they’d be like.

I also feel the same way about books I enjoy, too.

7.  I still sleep with my stuffed Winnie the Pooh.

He’s my boyfriend! Apart from the BBE, of course. And he doesn’t judge me for drooling or snoring. He doesn’t get mad when I push him out of the bed and hog his covers. You gotta appreciate that.

6.  When I’m on my own, I enjoy watching Britcoms, especially “The Vicar Of Dibley”.

PBS used to show old Britcoms on Saturday nights. I have never minded not having something to do on a Saturday night: snuggling up in my PJs in the bed with Winnie the Pooh and the most awesome comedies to come out of the UK in the 80’s is TOTALLY fun to me.

5. I can pinch things with my toes. I don’t know how I learned to do it, I just always have. I use my toes to pick up things when I’m lazy, and also to terrorize people. Toe pinching hurts!

4. When no one’s home, I put Rockband or Band Hero into the wii, turn it up loud and sing to my heart’s content. The whole time I’m doing it I’m paranoid that someone’s going to come in and catch me.

3. I’m more of a hopeless romantic than I let on. I love grand gestures, flowers, love notes, surprises. Perhaps a side effect of reading too much Jane Austen? What’s weird is that I’m NOT comfortable with excessive amounts of PDA. Hand holding is pretty much as far as it will go.

2. I’m obsessed with body functions. I’m also particularly obsessed with cleaning my ears. I also have a tendency to stick my finger in my belly button and sniff it.

1. I still watch Degrassi on Teen Nick sometimes (I have nothing further to say on the subject).

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Happy Feet

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So I starting thinking about feet earlier today.

I’m not like a foot fetishist or anything – it just occured to me that this is a very interesting topic… here in Florida we pretty much have only one season: SUMMER. It can be broken up into three distinct seasonal periods – Mild Summer, Hot Summer and REALLY HOT Summer. You rarely see too many Floridians outside in the middle of a hot July day unless there’s alcohol and/or shade involved. Or maybe food. Or maybe food, booze AND shade? Damn! That’s like, the trifecta of summer happiness right there!!! 🙂

With our perpetual summer comes an excess of summer and open-toed footwear. There’s an ongoing parade of parties, dinners, festivals, fairs, beach events and barbecues where you find yourself in summer shoe wear. Thusly, it is imperative to keep your feet in pretty good shape when wearing open toed shoes, flip flops, sandals, etc. Can’t afford to hit up the nail salon every week for a pedicure? Not a problem!!! This is a tough economy – no one knows that better than me. All we’re asking (and I speak fof the general toe-viewing public here) is that you keep ’em neat, trimmed and moisturized. Get a Ped Egg at Target. I suggest a nice nail polish as well whenever possible. Is that too much to ask?

I am VERY embarrassed by my feet. They not horrible or anything, just not like, you know, perfect. The hospitality industry can be tough on your tootsies. With that said, I always make sure that I keep them moisturized, scrubbed, trimmed and with a nice nail polish on them. I’ve been paranoid about them ever since I was in high school. Sitting in the nail shop one day getting my nails done and I heard the manicurists yelling ” you pay extra! you pay extra!” at another patron. I honestly don’t know if the lady was yelling this because the person’s toes were utterly jacked up or if she was charging extra for him/her to cop a feel during a session… either way I’m scared to death of plopping into that chair and having them appraise my feet and then jack up the price because they’re so effing busted.

Also, here’s a thought – what if you’re snuggling up to Mr. Right?? You don’t want to scare him away with scaly feet. Ugh, what about when you’re taking off your shoes to walk through security at the airport? Asking for help in the shoe department at Nordstrom? Standing on the scale at the gynecologist’s office? As a deeply paranoid person I think about this stuff ALL the time, and find myself looking at other people’s toes. When toes catch my eye I’m usually think either “man I wish mine looked like that!” or “THANK YOU BABY JESUS for not giving me toes like that!”

So I’m kinda thankful for the feet I have. After all, they could always look like this: